Jack of All (Self-Help) Trades, Master of None

Knowledge is often framed to us as power. Yet, for many of us, we’ve approached knowledge as a single-mindedly intellectual pursuit when I’m here to argue that it is, in fact, a full body experience.

Let’s get started.

How often do you find yourself consuming self-help content? Reading all the books (hi, hello, oh heeyyyyy), listening to all the podcasts (wdup), even meditating?

There’s a funny paradox that exists in self-help culture. We can learn and read and listen as much as we want…and yet still feel stuck in the ruts of our patterns of reactivity or avoidance. So, does intellectual knowledge lead to meaningful change in our lives?

I would argue it does not. In fact, bombarding ourselves with self-help content can often kick us clean off the path of healing…and we let it because it comes disguised in a super sophisticated package of wellness goodness. But how could listening to a wellness podcast possibly be counterproductive, Sarah?! Well, it’s not the actual listening that is counterproductive. It’s our level of embodiment. Our pacing, our presence, and permission to digest this information. To allow for the mysterious ways it can enlighten our lives. 

Imagine you’re a gardener and you’ve just planted some seeds in some good, fertile soil. There’s really no way to manipulate the skies into helping speed these seeds along in their growth with sun and water. There are, though, conditions that help support growth - offering daily care, paying attention when something looks off…you get the idea.

There is so much important information to learn about healing and wellbeing, yet we often approach it in the same way we’re taught to learn things growing up: identify goals + select key information + consume = magical “knowledge transfer”. And while that might work when it comes to calculus, I don’t think it even comes close with regard to our own psychological progress.

As a recovering intellectualizer, I’ve learned a thing or two about consuming information through the mind and forgetting about the body. It’s totally seductive to pick up all the books and learn all the theory. Why wouldn’t you?! There’s information out there right now that has the potential to answer so many questions about life and even possibly help rewire learned patterns of behavior.

Unfortunately - or fortunately - that’s not how it works in practice. There’s a stubborn mystery to healing and there’s a reason for that. Our minds are helpful tools - magnificent starting points - but our bodies and hearts digest things on their own timeline. Just like a seedling. Any accelerating or slowing down of this organic process may just be pointing to parts within ourselves that need some paying attention to. 

So here I am, entering my voice into the self-help arena at the risk of sounding hypocritical. Sure, I may be adding to the noise but my hope is more to relieve, rather than burden, people of the pressures of capitalistic, patriarchal, western wellness. It’s the dilemma I think many well-meaning self-help content creators probably face. How to share information in such a way that actually effects long-lasting change.

Please, keep doing what works for you and trust that wherever you are - whether you’re fiercely wanting to rush your healing, to slow it down, or to put it away for a bit - know you’re right where you’re supposed to be. 

I hope this serves as a reminder that healing is a natural force unto itself. May you harvest during summer, prepare in autumn, surrender to winter winds, and find new life on the other side.